Friday, May 7, 2010

So What Is Love and What Are Memories?

I wrote this three or four weeks ago...  I wasn't in a good mood, but I thought I should share anyway, because as I said when I started this little blog, that I was going to share my truth.

The title of this post is a quote from a character in one of my favorite old books called "A Sense of Honor" which was written by a man who would, many years later, be elected as a Virginia Democrat, to the United States Senate. 

The character was a Marine who had returned from Vietnam and when reunited with his wife was told that she wanted a divorce, when he asked his wife if she loved him, she replied "So what is love?, and what are memories?

So... that is my question.  What IS love?  What are memories?  Further... what is infatuation?  what is living with ridiculous hopes?

I feel...  I feel.

I feel a lot of things, and they aren't all good.  Sometimes (often) sad.  Sometimes angry and resentful.  Sometimes I talk to myself (but not too much).

I feel things.

Sometimes I think that I feel too much.  I never think that I don't feel enough. 

Sometimes I feel like screaming... but we can't have that, can we?  After all, I am a respectable guy.  I am considered strong, tough, and steady by people who know me.  Can't let the side down, eh?

Feeling loved is important to me.  I don't feel that enough.

Bah... it's Friday, I'm going to go home and feel... whatever it is I'm going to feel... but I suppose I should go feel it there instead of at my desk.